By: Arden Cartrette After experiencing the heartbreaking loss of a miscarriage, it is essential to seek support and guidance during the tumultuous journey of grief and healing. This is where the invaluable role of a bereavement doula comes into play. Hiring a bereavement doula can be a lifeline during this deeply emotional time, providing a compassionate and nonjudgmental presence. They possess a wealth of knowledge about the physical and emotional aspects of miscarriage, allowing them to offer tailored support to individuals and couples. In 2018, I suffered the first of two consecutive miscarriages, and I struggled to understand what was happening to me and how I could move forward in the healthiest way possible. It’s for this reason that I set out to create a way for people to have access to miscarriage support at the time they need it the most. The Miscarriage Doula is an online service and resource for those who suffer through pregnancy loss. Since opening in December 2020, we’ve served over 700 people and have a team of six doulas who are professionally trained and have personal experience with loss. We offer virtual one-on-one grief support and support groups, as well as self-paced webinars covering a range of topics and more. Our goal is to provide affordable and accessible support for every person. So how does a bereavement doula differ from other types of grief support? By understanding the complex nature of grief, bereavement doulas can help navigate the unique challenges that arise after a miscarriage, offering a safe space to express emotions and process the loss. As doulas, our empathetic guidance and practical resources assist in finding healing rituals, accessing therapeutic support, and fostering self-care. The presence of a bereavement doula can bring tremendous comfort, validation, and reassurance to those navigating the intimate and painful journey of miscarriage, reminding them that they do not have to endure it alone. In this blog post, we explore the importance of hiring a bereavement doula after a miscarriage and how we can provide support during this difficult journey. Providing Emotional Support Grief is a complex and personal journey. When experiencing a miscarriage, many people find it challenging to express their emotions or even understand what they're going through. A bereavement doula can offer a safe and nonjudgmental space for individuals to share their feelings, fears, and concerns. By providing active listening and empathy, doulas help normalize the emotions associated with miscarriage and offer validation during this vulnerable time. Assisting with Decision-Making After a miscarriage, individuals and couples may be faced with various decisions regarding burial arrangements, memorial services, or even whether to try for another pregnancy. This can be overwhelming when already dealing with the loss. A bereavement doula can provide valuable information, resources, and guidance to help individuals make informed decisions that align with their personal values and wishes. Having an experienced professional by your side ensures that you don't have to navigate these decisions alone. Creating Rituals and Honoring the Loss Finding ways to honor the life that was lost during a miscarriage can be an essential part of the healing process. A bereavement doula can help individuals and couples create personalized rituals or ceremonies that hold meaning for them. Whether it involves planting a tree, creating artwork, or participating in a memorial event, doulas provide the necessary guidance and support to help individuals commemorate their loss in a way that feels authentic and healing. Nurturing Self-Care and Coping Strategies Grief can take a toll on one's emotional and physical well-being. Bereavement doulas understand the importance of self-care during this challenging period and can help individuals develop coping strategies that work best for them. From simple practices like breathing exercises and journaling to connecting individuals with counseling or support groups, doulas offer a wide range of resources and tools to facilitate healing and self-compassion. Normalizing the Grieving Process Unfortunately, society often dismisses or minimizes the grief experienced after a miscarriage. This can leave individuals feeling isolated and misunderstood. By hiring a bereavement doula, you invite a professional who not only understands the complexities of this loss but also works towards destigmatizing the grieving process. Doulas provide a safe space where individuals can openly acknowledge their pain and find solace in knowing that their feelings are valid and shared by others who have walked a similar path. Finding a Qualified Bereavement Doula Many birth workers who are in the birthing space may be qualified to also support people following a miscarriage or other types of pregnancy loss. To find a professional in your area, search for pregnancy, birth, or postpartum doulas along with bereavement-specific doulas. Grief support can be provided in-person or virtually. Arden Cartrette Arden Cartrette is a Certified Birth + Bereavement Doula based in North Carolina who works with clients worldwide through the company, The Miscarriage Doula + Co. Founded in 2020 to be a virtual resource and service for people navigating pregnancy loss, she is focused on providing accessible care to everyone in the miscarriage community. With a team of six doulas and over 700 clients to date, The Miscarriage Doula is changing the way we talk about miscarriage and the way we support people through loss. Find her on IG at @themiscarriagedoula and listen to her podcast “Miscarriage Stories” on Apple Podcasts & Spotify.
